Accidentally Attachment Parenting

I had heard of Attachment Parenting before being pregnant. Heard of it and not really understood it. I thought it all sounded a little hippy and over the top. I never thought it would be for me, that is for sure. But here I am, my baby is 3 months old and without realising, I fit the mould for Attachment Parenting. In fact, I’ve been practicing it for the last 3 months and I had no idea. It was not until the death of Peaches Geldof in the news that I looked in to it further and came to the realisation that I do practice Attachment Parenting and have been since the very beginning.

There are the 7 B’s of Attachment Parenting. The 7 B’s are as follows:

1. Birth bonding
2. Belief in the signal value of your baby’s cries
3. Breastfeeding
4. Babywearing
5. Bedding close to baby
6. Balance and boundaries
7. Beware of baby trainers

Birth Bonding: I had skin to skin contact immediately after birth and for a couple of hours. J was not taken from me until I gave the go ahead for him to get measured and weighed. So, for over 2 hours we laid skin to skin and I nursed him for the first time and then once more in that period. For the next few days after, he was rarely out of my arms or far away from me. In fact 3 months later and he still is rarely more than a metre from me at all times. Just the way I like it!

Belief in baby’s cries: I take J’s cries very seriously. He is crying for a reason. Babies are NOT manipulative and do not cry to annoy their parents. Listening to your baby cry is distressing and I do what I can as fast as I can to help my son.

Breastfeeding: We have been exclusively breastfeeding for over 3 months now, and we love it! I originally wanted to aim for 6 months, but now I want to aim for twelve months and maybe more. We have had our fair share of troubles with feeding, but we have stuck at it and I am so glad I have as I really do love it.

Babywearing: we own an Ergo and J loves it. My husband and I both wear him and love snuggling him close.

Bedding close to baby: J sleeps in our room, in his cot. We plan to keep him there for twelve months. It works for us, as if he wakes in the night for a feed, he is right there. Bed sharing is not something we do in this house, but of course he comes in some mornings and we all have a doze.

Balance and Boundaries: We pretty much go with J’s cues and he runs the show for now. But my husband’s and my relationship has not been compromised because we love our family time and we have the same parenting style. I feel like we have an amazing balance going on.

Beware of baby trainers: I know a lot of people who swear by baby trainers. Training our son is not for us. We instinctively do what is best for our family. It is great when J sleeps through the night, which is most of the time, but I do not want to train him to do this full time. If he needs to feed during the night, you can bet he’s going to be fed. Plus I love the night time snuggles!

If someone asked "what kind of Mum are you?", I would answer that I am the best Mum I can be for my son. I don't love the labels that society put on things. But I definitely identify strongly with Attachment Parenting. I can see it is what I have been practicing all along. To me it has come really naturally and it is second nature to do the things that are characteristic traits of Attachment Parenting. Basically it all comes down to me wanting what is best for my son and I believe what is best for him is for us to have an incredible bond and for him to know that I am always close by if he needs me.

I do not judge anyone else's parenting style or choices. I think every Mother is doing a fantastic job. Attachment Parenting works for me and my family, but what works for others is going to be different and I respect that.